In a plot twist nobody saw coming, Donald Trump decided to publicly roast two of the biggest fossil fuel companies on the planet for making way too much money. That's right, the guy who basically made "drill baby drill" his personal mantra is now going after ExxonMobil and Chevron like they stole his parking spot at Mar-a-Lago.
Speaking with reporters at the White House on Monday, the President delivered what can only be described as a verbal spanking of the oil giants over their ridiculously fat second quarter earnings. His critique was eloquent and nuanced: "Chevron, too much money. ExxonMobil, too much. Too much money." Shakespeare is rolling in his grave with envy.
Trump then escalated things by essentially telling these corporations to fork over some savings at the pump. "They better cut the retail price, the consumer price," he declared, adding that he wanted everyone to hear him loud and clear about his displeasure. Imagine being the CEO of a company worth hundreds of billions and getting scolded on national television like a teenager who blew their allowance.
The timing here is chef's kiss. Both companies just posted absolute banger earnings reports fueled by higher crude prices and beefier refining margins during the ongoing Iran conflict. Chevron logged its strongest quarterly performance in at least six years, while Exxon wasn't far behind. Valero Energy and Marathon Petroleum also cashed in big time from skyrocketing oil prices.
But Trump saved special venom for Chevron CEO Mike Wirth, who apparently committed the cardinal sin of going on Fox News without sufficiently genuflecting before the administration. Trump fired off a Truth Social post complaining that Wirth neglected to credit the "genius, foresight, strength, and stability" of the Trump Administration. He literally called himself a genius in all caps. You can't make this stuff up.
He also noted that Chevron has operated in Venezuela for over a century and is now positioned to rake in huge profits there, thanks in part to administration policies. Unlike ExxonMobil and ConocoPhillips, which bailed on Venezuelan operations after Hugo Chavez nationalized oil assets back in 2007, Chevron stuck around and expanded.
Meanwhile, Americans are still staring at gas station signs showing prices north of four dollars per gallon, a jump of over 30 percent since the Iran conflict threw global energy markets into chaos. Crude oil prices have dipped slightly on hopes for diplomatic progress, but pump prices are taking their sweet time catching up, as they always mysteriously do.
The American Petroleum Institute pushed back, arguing that global supply and demand plus uncertainty around the Strait of Hormuz are the real culprits, not corporate greed. Sure, and my dog ate my homework.
Trump, ever the optimist, predicted oil prices would "drop through the floor" once the Iran situation resolves. So all we need is peace in the Middle East and everything will be fine. Easy peasy.
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